A reality check & checking into reality (#56)

Can I just say that I am thrilled to have a TWO new followers? Plus, being in the know that people lurk -yes, LURK- this blog makes me smile. So hats off to you, creepy random lurkers!

I have to confess, I haven't completed another number as of yet. I'm certainly making good progress on a few, but they take a lot of time and energy. Like I said previously, I definitely don't want to start making excuses for myself. After having some time to look at my list a little more carefully, I know there are a couple of challenges ahead, beyond the actual challenges of completing the tasks themselves.

It was a little naive of me to assume that, in a little under 3 years time, my goals and aspirations wouldn't change. I look at this list 2 years later and a lot of the things that I wanted to accomplish are no longer an integral part of who I am anymore. Specifically, there are a bunch of acting-centric goals on my list and, while I do love acting and will continue to pursue it when time allows for it, I no longer am committed to it as a career. This doesn't make me sad or make me feel like I've failed in any respect. Theatre school introduced me to different elements of the arts; an interest in performing turned into an interest in writing, that turned into an interest in directing, that turned into an interest in casting. And while I'm sure the girl who was fresh out of Theatre & Drama Studies would have loved to #10 act in a one-woman show, #24 take an on-camera intensive workshop and #84 do a touring theatre show, there are many other new facets of life I'd like to explore beyond performing. It's funny to think that the reason I used to enjoy performing was because of the escapism it afforded me from my own skin. I've slowly become familiar with my quirks and neuroses and embraced them. In other words, while acting to me will always be fun, I no longer feel connected to it as I once did - perhaps because I no longer feel a need to be someone else.

Well, deep, huh?

Another apparent issue with the list is how relationship driven it is. There are a number of tasks that are steeped in romanticism or require a significant other. Some are innocent enough but I can remember the girl who wrote them and the context they were written in. Not so innocent! I have to remind myself that this list is not made to impress or attract anyone; these experiences are to be my own. That's not to say I wouldn't love to accomplish these tasks with others. For me, the best experiences are those with friends. So many things on my list would be made all the better if they were accomplished alongside a friend who shared that same goal or interest. I just want to remind myself that this list is for me; it is my inventory and evolution of self, no one else's. Especially not an attractive boy's. No matter how attractive he is. Even if he was...super...attractive.

Basically, I was single when I started the list, and it is more than okay to be single as I finish it. And 22 year old Marisa: shame on you for thinking you require a romantic interest for fun life experiences!

Now nothing's impossible and you never know what will happen in a year, but I've vowed that, due to evolving tastes, the wording of certain goals may need to be revised. Not eliminated, just updated.

But enough YAMMERING. What have I been up to?!

#56: WATCH A DOCUMENTARY EVERY OTHER WEEK

I LOVE a well-done documentary. I'm a big geek like that. I want to know more about the world and other cultures and other sub-cultures and people and places and things that normally I wouldn't have a chance to experience.Now, seeing as how I'm a year or so behind on my list, playing catch up on this is tricky. Especially when I actually counted out 1001 days worth of weeks....or maybe vice versa. That would be 62 documentaries! That's a lot of educational learning. Now, thank God they don't make documentaries like they used to. I remember in Grade 8, we actually sat down in Geography class to watch an educational series on a pencil factory. A pencil factory. Did I mention my elementary school didn't use coloured chalk in fear that it would promote creative thought?

Who needs pencil factory docs when you have HD cameras zooming around the world? Ladies and gentlemen, I have fallen in love with a series. Its name?

Yeah yeah yeah, I'm like EONS behind for just becoming obsessed with this now but...ah....bla....not to sound like a hippie, but our world is BEAUTIFUL and COMPLEX and FASCINATING! I am enthralled with this series and I love learning about places and creatures I never knew existed. Who knew glowworm mucas in caves could be so thrilling? I've currently watched 3 episodes, and I do believe there are 5 more to go. And if the education isn't enough, the series is chalk-full of adorable baby animals.

Warning: Sometimes they get slaughtered. Just sayin'.

Since I've made my list, I've also been following the documentaries of Louis Theroux, a British journalist and broadcaster who somehow manages to charm his interviewees, no matter how crazy they are, by his (perhaps put on) unassuming nature. There's a charming naivety to him and while I would guess it's partially an act, it shatters the defenses of many of his subjects, allowing Louis to get away with asking questions that most aren't brave enough to pose. I've watched all 16 episodes of his "Weird Weekends" series, where he immerses himself into a social sub-cultures - think "World of Jenks" for the millennium.

After that was a 5-episode series entitled "When Louis Met..." featuring prominent (and sometimes controversial) British figures who Louis would seemingly befriend. No matter what, I have always found Louis charming and delightfully geeky. I have watched 6 additional documentaries of his, including possibly the most jarring one where he interview the Phelps family, aka "The Most Hated Family in America". Of course, documentaries aren't necessarily intended to be pleasant, and there is often a lot to despise in Louis Theroux documentaries. I am grateful for the ability to watch something and be able to think on it as opposed to the mindless reality shlock that's churned out so easily on TV. Not that I'm above that by any means...in fact, I would love if there was a Louis Theroux doc on Jersey Shore.

I've recently re-watched two documentaries that upon first viewing, dug deep under my skin - Jesus Camp and Hell House. Now, I won't go into how I feel about these documentaries because this blog isn't necessarily meant to be a sounding board for certain opinions of mine. However I highly recommend that everyone see these two films for themselves. I also recently watched Capturing the Friedmans, which chronicled the devastation of a family after the patriarch and son have been accused of abuse. Very very dark, disturbing and heart-breaking, but rewarding in the sense that it's thought-provoking and stays with you long after it ends.

To sum up, with the help of http://topdocumentaryfilms.com/ and the accumulating list of films I have seen and want to seem, this goal's end of 62 documentaries may be close in sight. So perhaps I shouldn't be so nervous about getting to the final number.

At the risk of writing a novel (I'm pretty sure that's on the list), I'll wrap this up. I'm focussed on a few other tasks at the moment but will blog on their update very, very soon. Thanks for reading!

<3,

m

#50: Give Ten "Just Because" Gifts

Hello, hello loyal readers! (All 2 of you...and of course, beloved lurkers everywhere).

As promised, I'm using this blogging opportunity to chronicle my latest task accomplishement, which was to make and mail out surprises for friends...just because. No rhyme, no reason, just because.

Of all things to kick-start my journey back into the project, I don't know what compelled me to choose this first. Although not as time consuming a project as #22, not as painful as #90, not as costly as #19, and not as "WTF WAS I THINKING WHEN I WROTE THIS" as #101, it still demands effort and patience. It was, however, easy to figure out what that "just because" gift would be. In fact, you only have to scroll down a few posts to check it out.

Go on, I'll give you a second.

....

You're too lazy to, huh?

...

Well, fine.

NUMBER #50

All hail the almighty mix CD! Pop culture envoys of emoting and dance routines in your bedroom! Who doesn't love

a good a mix CD? Robots, probably, since they don't emote or dance.

As previously mentioned, I think there's a certain art to making a quality mix CD that I like to think I've finely honed over the years. Therefore, I decided to put my "craft" to the test and make ten individualized mix CD's for the ten friends who were brave enough to privately message me with their mailing address. They had/have no idea why I was requesting mailing addresses, but they must have been re-assured by my promises of nothing illegal. Or maybe they were slightly disappointed...

The great challenge was to create 10 very different soundtracks for ten very different people. But I think I got it covered:

Ian B. was the first to volunteer for my mysterious project, which thrilled me. Ian B. is all sorts of cool, so I knew that the bar had to be set prety high. I met Ian early this year while I worked at the Young Centre and we clicked easily...possibly because he's full of awesome. He also appreciates my undying love of Hip-Hop Abs. His disbelief has turned into that of appreciation of it. Or so I like to think.

I've known Chris S. since kindergarten, where we'd spend recesses playing Darkwing Duck. We've stayed friends for over many years,

attending the same high school and University together. Chris S. is smart. Like, ridiculously so. One day, he's probably going to

start invading small countries....and then bigger ones. One day, Chris S. will be dictator of the universe. I hope he's a benevolent one at least.

Carrie M and I went to high school together and she's continued her journey of awesomeness and general kick-assery ever since. I've always admired Carrie's confidence, coolness, and extreme lack of BS. Carrie, if you're reading this, the more I think about it, you are like a classy J-WOW. There, I said it. You're my J-WOW. My C-WOW, if you will.

Okay, pardon the formatting on this puppy. Just tilt your head and and enjoy the magic.

Qasim was to be my future husband. My mother had arranged our wedding, promising a huge dowry. There were sheep involved. Long story short, it didn't work out, but we're still really great friends. In our first year of University, Qasim loved "sass". He loved saying it, demonstrating, making sacrifices in the name of it. We have one of those crazy great dialogues where pretty much everything we say is wordplay. Some may call that stupid; we call it a 6 year friendship.

I met Will through Qasim and was immediately impressed by him. My mother would have tried to arrange a marriage if she had met him. Wait, now that I remember, she did meet him. And tried to arrange a marriage! Personally, I can't stand another would-be husband ditching me. Anyways, a tangent. I hope you enjoy your CD and walking out on our non-existing hypothetical marriage, Will.

I met Sean my first year in University and in fact, dated him for a little bit. Yes folks, let's get present to the fact that sometimes, I date.

We're friends now, because he's a pretty cool guy. Although, I'm sure one of us is going to end up in a ditch somewhere because of the other...and yet, I'm not quite sure who. Sean's aiming to be a teacher. He could be a minstrel, also. Hence his CD's theme.

Similar to Chris, Ian C. will also put in a good effort to take over the world. But to do so, he must battle an army of robots. His only weapon? The love in his heart.

Sam and I became friends through University, but it wasn't until a trip to Israel that we really bonded. Sam is just one of those girls who is filled with joy, warmth, and humour. It's always great to have positive people in your life and my days are just a little darker now

that I don't see her everyday. Hanging out with her is a natural pick-me-up because she always makes me smile and laugh. So Sam: Date soon?

A Mix CD for my wifey. A.k.a, my bff Chantal. I don't want to say much about it because, if this truly is a blog about gratitude, there will be whole posts dedicated to her in the future. How much do I love this lady? Well, we had a fake wedding ceremony last year, vows and everything. We're pretty awesome/frightening like that. Anyways. She's brilliant and possibly the greatest human being alive.

Now, I'm ashamed to admit my math is terrible, because I thought I had taken photos of all ten CD's. If you've been counting, you'll have noticed where only at 9, despite the first picture including all ten CD's. So, my apologies to the lovely (and forgiving) Janelle, whose CD - Songs To Dance It Out To- is most certainly on its way to your mailbox. I promise that it's full of dance-worthy goodness and soulful tunes and both kick-start and end the day!

It was a pleasure to complete this task and I hope the recipients enjoy them. Simply put, it's just nice to make something you know will be enjoyed, particularly when the people are so great and deserving of a positive surprise. See? You're totally rewarded by giving out your home addresses for an unknown reason. No bombs here, kiddos.

Anyways, as the song says, onto the next one, onto the next one...

That is how it goes, right?

More updates to come! Thanks for reading/lurking.

<3,

m

IT'S AN EPIC UPDATE OF EPIC UPDATE-NESS!

OH HEY GUYS, WHAT'S UP?!

Yes, that's right. After treating this blog like a bastard ginger step-child for so many months, I'm back and (arguably) better than ever! There's been a lot of great things that I have kept me busy smiling and ...not...typing. So before I dive into the real motivation of what's kicked my ass into the high-gear of updates, let me do a quick run down of life updates that have occurred in the past couple of months:

*I directed two shows this summer and had an absolute BLAST! Both casts of Dog Sees God: Confessions of a Teenage Blockhead and Eternal Friendship with a Spotless Smile were brilliant and lovely and just super duper good-looking. The shows were both incredibly well received, with audience demands of a remount for the former and the title of Patron's Pick for the latter. High fives 'yall.

*I sadly had to quit my job at the Young Centre. The good news? It's because I now work full time for a well-known and respected casting director. Yessir, that little internship has spun itself into full-time employment that keeps me very, very busy. I'm so incredibly grateful for the opportunity. The job might not be glamourous and I'm certainly not living the high life on the money I make, but that fact is I have a job (which is lucky) that puts my degree to work (which is luckier) and I genuinely enjoy it (which is even luckier). So if ever I complain about the long hours and high levels of stress, just punch me in the teeth.

*I was a bridesmaid in a good friend's wedding, which meant jet-setting off to the Bahamas and being filmed by Rich Bride, Poor Bride. No big deal or anything. There's a lot of photographic blackmail of me floating around on the interwebz and you may or may not want to avoid watching the Slice network next March.

*I've fallen in LOVE! That's right! L'il 'ol me. Wanna meet him?

Well, you can't, because he doesn't know I'm alive. His name is Shaun T and he's the fitness guru behind "Hip Hop Abs", a series of hilarious dance-infused workouts that have helped my behind fit into my high school jeans. Or are currently trying to help fit it into my high school jeans. Funnily enough, Shaun never returns my calls though. And something tells me I'm just not his type...

So despite all the goings-on AND what with me now making this blog public (Hi new friends! *wink* *nudge* *twitch* wink wink*), I really have no reason to ditch the blogging. For shame, Ship. For shame.

There is some bad news I have to cop to. My battle with gluten ensues. I recently admitted defeat when I caught a head cold this past weekend and wanted to devour everything in sight. And the desire to decrease alcohol consumption is a war that continues to be fought, despite it being all but ignored in the Bahamas. An all-inclusive? Safe to say I got off the plane, started drinking, and didn't stop until I got back on the plane.

Now, as I return back to this, it's hard to choose a few things to just be grateful for. Instead, I like to focus on one all-encompassing document that I hope to blog about more consistently in the future. It is...

THE LIST

On Monday, December 29th, 2008, I stumbled across a livejournal community that piqued my interest. It was based off the Day Zero Project (www.dayzeroproject.com), a project aimed for individuals to complete 101 tasks or "Things" to do in 1001 days. The project was designed to help beat procrastination for all those things we say we'll do and never end up doing. The benefit of it is that it allows several seasons to complete the tasks, which is much better for planning ahead and organizing more time/season-specific goals. Instead of making short-term New Year's resolutions that never pan out, I decided to make my own Day Zero list in the hopes to live life to the fullest and learn a little more about myself. The only rule to making a "101 Things to Do in 1001 Days" list is that the result for each goal must be measurable or clearly defined. The tasks should also be realistic and require some effort. As I started on Dec. 29 in 2008, the 1001 days was set to end on September 26, 2011 - a little over a year from now. And just as I had predicted on my list, I had "a feeling some things will fall behind". And they did.

I started out with a bang: #1. Make a a list of 101 things to do within 1001 days? Check. #34: Refuse to support any Dove/Unilever products? Check. #66: Do an excellent job on my Athabasca exams? Check. #80: Cut communication with any passive-aggressive person who is causing me stress? Hella check.

But I soon grew distracted with graduation, a new relationship and moving out from my childhood home. My list became misplaced. Out of sight, out of mind. I didn't think about it anymore. Until a few weeks ago, feeling listless and bored, stumbled across it once again.

Now, if you're reading this...if anyone actually reads this, this might seem a little cheesy. Well, I'm cheesy. I'm awkward and quirky and goofy and cheesy because I think things happen for a reason. I think I needed to re-discover my list when I did - with only a little more than a year to go and a reminder to myself that no matter how busy things get, I need to get back to enjoying my life, challenging myself, and feeling comfortable in my own skin.

The great news is that, upon re-discovery, I learned I could cross a bunch of things off my list now:

#2. Find satisfying, stress-free full-time employment in Toronto within my field. (Stress-free? Ha! But CHECK!)

#4. Write/act/direct a play for the Toronto Fringe Festival. (And it had a boglin puppet in it! CHECK!)

#7. Lose 10 pounds through healthy means and maintain the weight loss (Check)

#14. Be involved in a healthy, long-term relationship. (Well, Check, right? Check.)

#18. Get my degree. (CHECK!)

#20. Buy a new little black cocktail dress. (Check!)

#21. Reduce alcohol consumption (BeforetheBahamasandLiz'sbacheloretteCHECK)

#26. Adapt to my stronger prescription glasses. (Check)

#30. Watch every episode of Doctor Who and Torchwood. NERDCHECK

#37. Change my patch to pill *or leave both behind* (CHECK!)

#38. Now, number 38 is private. I even wrote "Private" on my list as I knew it was only for my knowledge. It is indeed very personal and very special. It was accomplished. And I feel very, very grateful for the party involved and very, very happy. Sigh. Check.

#53 Plan a surprise party (Check!)

#82. Save up for a better laptop (Check!)

#88. Go back to the drive-in (Check!)

#91. Re-organize my closet and make donations to Goodwill (Check)

#93. Be both the big spoon and the little spoon. (Ugh. Check. But can I get a re-do?)

#96. Go on a blind date. A successful blind date. (Ch-ch-check it out).

There are some big'uns there....but there is a whooooooole lot more to get accomplished. I will try my very best to get it all done and will use this blog to help chart my progress (which will in turn help me accomplish #89: Publicly update a blog about the progress of my list).

And in the small chance that someone reads this, I hope you get inspired to tackle things that will challenge you and things that will make you smile. Life is too short to just coast by. It's also too short for frowning. So do something amazing! Do something for yourself. For someone else. For the purpose of just doing something! It's fun, I promise you.

So next update will be my super secret #50: Give ten "just because" gifts.

Well, I guess it's not so secret if I just...told you...

Oh.

Well.

SEE YA, NERDS!

xoxo

m